I wrote a post earlier this week entitled “Black Man” where I discussed the lack of a movement signifying solidarity among the black community in America. I personally found it frustrating that there hasn’t been substantial progress since the pro-black movement of the ’70s, ’80s, and even early ’90s.

With that being said, I thought I’d try something new.  No, I’m not going to form a new-age Black Panther party or attempt to guilt folks into doing better.  Rather, I’ll use this blog to introduce to you, the black reader, someone in our community that does something to break the stereotype.  Someone that helps to move the black community forward in any which way, big or small.  You may or may not care and that’s fine.  But at least it’s a step forward.

Meet Rochelle Ritchie

The first person I’d like to introduce to you is a black female reporter from Florida.  I came across the story on Essence.com and thought it was note-worthy.

Rochelle Ritchie is a reporter at the NBC-affiliate station in West Palm Beach, FL who decided to remove the extensions, chop off her relaxed hair and go natural – and documented the transformation for a news segment.  She recounts a story about how it was difficult for her to find a job after graduating college because of her then-look, sporting a “relaxed, shoulder-length” hairstyle.

Who cares, right? Well if you’re black and a woman then you know the unnecessary dilemmas we face when creating a hairstyle that is considered “work appropriate.”  Though we’ve made considerable strides in accepting a wide variety of hairstyles to wear to the office - long, short, braids, locks, fros, curls, etc - the fact is black women still have to be extra careful in choosing their coiffe-du-jour. 

Yes, it is understandable that some black women just want an easier process to manage their hair, a change, or to just try something different and that’s okay.  But in many industries where personal appearance has the potential to affect the business of the company (such as news reporters), black women are still caving in to the pressure to process, straighten, and artificially elongate their hair in styles similar to their non-black counterparts, which is unfair and damaging to the black woman’s self-esteem.

The appearance of the black woman’s hair is a culture that obviously has its roots (no pun intended) in the country’s dark chapters of race relations.  Though the black and female demographic may now be more accepting of their natural hair than ever before, there still seems to be a lack of role models where it probably matters most to the ‘natural hair movement’ - the media.  In fact, I can only think of a few of people right off that bat – such as Solange Knowles, Lauryn Hill (pre-meltdown), and Whoopi Goldberg – that sport their unique, natural look.  But Ms. Ritchie lets us know that it’s ok to love your curls and kinks. Kudos to her.

Read more about Rochelle Ritchie and watch the video here on Essence.com: Florida TV Reporter Goes Natural in Front of Viewers

P.S. I need a title for this segment so give me a suggestion.  “Black Person of the Day” just sounds….bad.

I was inspired to write this post as I was listening to “Black Man” off of Stevie Wonder’s “Songs in the Key of Life” LP record – yes, as in vinyl.  Currently, I am infatuated with the tales of the ’60s and ’70s including the musical geniuses that flourished throughout these two decades, the movements, the need to make things happen – to bring about change. 

The reason I bring this up is because of electoral statistics from the just recent midterm elections.  According to CBS News’ national exit polls, only 10% of us voted this year – a 3% decline from black voter turnout during the 2008 Presidential election.  Black folks make up about 12% of the US population which is estimated to be about 37 million.  Of course not all 37 million are of voting age; and this fact only lowers the black voter turnout number further.  Heck,  CBS’s numbers may even be skewed but we all know that the figure is low.  My point is what the hell is the problem.

I understand some of the reasons for low turnout because I studied it in my AP Gov’t class in high school: political apathy, lack of higher education, etc.  But one would think, after all the adversity black people have gone through since the founding of this country, there would be a sense of urgency or pride to get out and vote, to do something.  Well, not so much.

Just because we have a black president does not mean that everything is hunky dory for us.  President Obama is not a band-aid for the black man’s problems. The black community is not united in the US.

Black people need a movement now more than ever, and it doesn’t exist. 

I wasn’t an Afro (African-American Studies) major in college, and I’m not going to pretend like I know every detail about the history of the black struggle in this country – which no doubt still manifests itself in 2010. But I do know that someone had to fight for the privilege for me to get a degree from a university, to vote (even if it’s between the lesser of two evils), to take advantage of opportunities that were denied to others in the past.  So why aren’t more of us taking advantage.  Rather than help our people grow, the black community still sees itself trudging along this path called progress. 

It’s called blaxploitation.

The formal term is referred to the film genre that essentially stereotypes blacks as pimps, drug dealers, poor people,  blah blah blah.  But I find the term to really encompass a broader view of how the black community allows others to exploit them.  For example, hip-hop was first and foremost a political movement that evolved from the realities of  disenfranchised black youth that were just fed up with what was going on.  It was a movement representing black solidarity like the black power movement of the 70s.  Over time, however, the suits in the music industry have created and marketed this cool, black, ‘thug mentality’ propaganda to the public in order to capitalize off of black folks – read: exploit black folks. Obviously there are exceptions to this statement, but only a handful. 

Comedian Paul Mooney said it best on the Dave Chappelle Show: “Everybody wanna be a n***a, but nobody wanna be a n***a.”   And there is a powerful truth in that.  There is some aura of “cool” associated with being black. But the real life circumstances of the average Black American demonstrate that it is better to imitate and capitalize off of black people - our appearance, our language, our talents, our music, our culture, our spending power, our EVERYTHING – rather than to empathize or to help us.  How is it that everyone else knows how to harness our evident power but us?

I’m not going to discredit those people that are trying to do something, to create change within the black community because I know that they are out there.  The problem is that they are competing with powerful industries that have developed effective means of exploiting the black community for decades.  When will we stand up for ourselves en masse again?   

Black people need a movement.

My number one rule in life when it comes to shopping: NEVER PAY RETAIL. 

And in this economy, it is probably the dumbest thing you can do.  With the advent of eBay, wholesale retailers, outlet stores, or discount department stores (think Marshalls or Filene’s Basement), there really isn’t any reason to pay full price.  In fact, I don’t remember the last time I bought anything that wasn’t on sale, or without a coupon/discount. 

In this light, I thought I’d share my newfound appreciation for eBay.  I joined the site earlier this week because there was something that I had to have – MJ memorabilia.  I had browsed for items before, but had always been afriad of being scammed, getting my identity stolen, etc., so I never joined.  Until Sunday.

Yes, I know I’m 15 years late but whatever, I had my reasons. 

Anyway, I won my first bid on an item on Sunday – the February 1983 issue of Rolling Stone magazine with Michael Jackson on the cover. This is one of the few magazines that actually had an in-depth interview with the late great singer as his solo career began to take off.  After that, he pretty much stopped doing print interviews; but magazines still put him on the cover. 

For example, TIME Magazine apparently broke a long-standing policy to not put anyone on their cover if they did not have an interview with that person.  In their March 1984 issue, TIME did just that when they put MJ on their cover; they were in fact unsuccessful in actually scoring an interview with him.  However, this magazine is my next hunt, as the cover was designed by Andy Warhol. (FYI – I am an admirer of MJ, in case you couldn’t tell). Anyway, I digress.

Breaking rules for MJ.

The Exception

The only exception to this rule is if what you’re trying to buy is a newly released item that is sure to sell out fast (i.e. something with a limited quantity or is exclusive). Once it’s gone, the price will only balloon as folks try to resell the item for a profit (think concert tix, Chanel limited edition nail polish, etc).

 Yes, it can be tedious and sometimes time-consuming to be a bargain hunter, but I think it’s well worth it.  Do the research and have a few places that you can count on for discount shopping.  Ask your friends for suggestions which will cut down your research time.  This way, once you know what you’re looking for, you can just do a quick search at these places that you trust for pricing and quality. 

For example, in my last entry, I mentioned a fragrance that I had bought for mother.  What I didn’t mention was how inexpensive it was. I shopped around and ended up purchasing a bottle from a perfume wholeseller here for about half the retail price.  A quick search on eBay this morning and I found it for half of what I paid (granted the auction hasn’t ended yet).  But you catch my drift.

What are some of your shopping tidbits?

Happy Shopping.

I like money.  I like having money and spending it on things that make me happy and comfortable.  I particularly like to spend money during Fall.  Why Fall, you ask?  It primarily has to do with the fact that September has been my “New Year” since I was five years old – the timing of the new school year in this country.  The new school year meant a change in the season.  New school supplies and new clothes were in order.  New = spending money.  Thus, Fall is my favorite time of year.

In this respect, I thought I’d share some material things that I’ve been eyeing for a while. 

Versace Signature Fragrance for Women

As I type away, I am currently staring at the box that arrived yesterday which contains said perfume.  It’s slightly creepy because Versace’s logo is the head of Medusa.  Anyway, I bought the wonderfully fresh-scented perfume for mother in an attempt to purchase Christmas gifts early. She tried my bottle and liked it.  But then I finished my bottle.  And Christmas is still far away. Dilemma ensues.

LP-to-Digital Recording System

A couple of months ago, I was able to inherit a record player (and radio/CD/cassette combo if you will) from my uncle that was moving.  This enabled my current addiction to buying records.  All was great until I found out that the tech world has combined the technologies of yesterday and today to produce this awesome device that allows you to convert your LPs to mp3 files.  Which is bananas.  It’s a turntable that plays your vinyl AND has a USB port so that you can hook it up to your computer and use the program to convert the music. The price is relatively affordable with the cheaper ones at around $60.  Here’s a nifty one by Ion:

SADE CONCERT TICKETS!!!!!!!!!!

Sade is one of those artists that can just decide to take a decade off from music and then come back, and STILL have her loyal fan base. Her most recent album came out last November, but I am forever a “Diamond Life” fan. In any case, they recently announced her WORLDWIDE TOUR in which the US leg will kick off in Baltimore, MD next year.  She will be in Chicago at the United Center on August 5, 2011 but tickets go on sale to the public this Monday, October 18. Yes, that is how awesome Sade is – selling tickets to her show almost a year in advance.  And considering her hiatus schedule, I am pretty sure this will be the only and last chance  for our generation to see her really rock out (she is 51 years young).  Hit me up if you want to join the fun. GO SADE!!!

The Cosby Show on DVD

I’m kind of bummed because this has been out for two years and I still haven’t bought it.  They came out with a 25th anniversary special that has all 8 seasons on DVD in this cool collectors set at around $100.  After reading reviews of the product however, it seems that there are some complaints with the actual packaging of the DVDs themselves.  Purchasing the individual seasons may be better but pricier.  Dilemma ensues.  

The Cosby Show is my absolute favorite television show in life – and I have watched a lot of television.  It’s an all-around feel-good family show.  And it’s still funny to watch – not like those other family shows that you loved watching as a kid, only to realize how painfully corny they actually were later in life (think “Family Matters,” “Full House”).

What are you dying to buy this season?

Yes, I’ve neglected you for over a month. I apologize for not entertaining you with my extraordinary wit and humor (sarcasm). But to be real…a sista’s gotta eat; and so I’ve been busy.

Anyway, it will be a year since I’ve graduated college next week, and it’s crazy to think about it. I’ve done a lot in a year…kinda. But I think the most important adventure I’ve been on is this little thing I’d like to call ‘self-discovery.’ I realized that I did a lot of things in college because either a) I’d never done it before, or b) because I figured I would enjoy it. Boy do you learn a lot more about what you enjoy and don’t enjoy after you leave that bubble. For example, the average 20-something-year old would frequent clubs all around the city for leisure. I went out twice this past weekend, which is pretty amazing considering I don’t enjoy it as much as I used to. But once I was out, I was reminded of why going to the club is just not my thing anymore.

Being Social at the Club

Coming from a sheltered environment, college was my social experience utopia. I went out wherever I wanted, whenever I wanted, with whomever I wanted. After two and a half years of exhausting every possible opportunity to go out, I became reluctant to attempt to put any effort into going out. I’ve been called ‘lame’ because I’d rather do something of more substance like staying in to read, or going to see a movie instead. In the year since I’ve been back in the city, my reluctance to go out has grown exponentially. Here’s why:

1. I don’t enjoy making conversation in an environment where I have to yell 100% of the time.

2. I get frustrated when people try to ask about your life story at the club. Last time I checked this was a club, not Oprah’s couch.

3. Please understand when I say I’m not conceited in the least - but I dread the moment when a guy attempts to talk to me…which happens 99.9% of the time. I sincerely appreciate the compliments, but I hate anticipating the male “spitting game” and then enduring the 5-10 minute schpiel on why we should exchange numbers.

4. I REALLY hate it when guys grab me. Or touch me in general. You know…that “inconspicuous” arm/hand grab as a female navigates the club. I am not your girl.  And I hate being touched.

5. Adding to #4 – I cannot endure super crowded venues anymore. Especially if it’s hot and and people are sweaty and you accidentally swipe arms as you try to pass each other; now you have someone else’s gross sweat on your perfectly dry arms. I HATE BEING TOUCHED. It messes up my equilibrium.

Drinking

In my personal opinion, alcohol is nasty. I used to drink before to get wasted, enjoy the stupidity of my actions while inebriated, and to be honest, because that was the environment I was in. And no, I don’t enjoy wine – even the cheap, watered down, sweet stuff. Anyone who drinks alcohol like it’s water is lying to themselves. Give me a glass of milk or juice.

Comfort

1. In the world of a female, comfort is generally the last thing that comes to mind when getting ready to go out.   Unless you are in VIP with a booth, you will more than likely be standing for at least 2-3 hours at the club in your stilletos.  I will gladly wear flats when I go out so as to not punish my toes for the sake of fashion. 

2. I understand people who want to look good when they go out, but be realistic. If it’s 20 degrees F outside, why the eff are you wearing a dress when you know you have to wait 20 min. in line? Why do girls panic about their chipped nail polish, if they don’t put on eyeliner, or if something in their outfit doesn’t match completely when the club is dark anyway? We’re not bats – NO ONE CAN SEE THAT MUCH EFFING DETAIL. Get over it.

Ok, that is all.  You are not lame for not going to every club, every weekend for the rest of your 20s.  You simply have learned what you enjoy and don’t enjoy.  Life is too short to spend it all in one type of environment.

I would like to first and foremost thank everyone for the birthday wishes I received yesterday. Despite being nonchalant and over the whole excitment of birthdays, it’s still nice to have the world recognize your existence for one day. Much appreciated. (Kind of makes me feel guilty for not writing ‘obligatory’ happy b-day messages for others on FB. But then again, if I say it, I want to mean it, right?)

Many people asked me if I was doing anything special for my birthday, and I replied that I wasn’t. Besides being broke like no other, I just got tired of trying to get people to go out and shell out money for a dinner or cover at some swanky club. Money that could have been better spent on something of more value (in my eyes anyway). So, I was kind of blah about the whole thing and thought that I should start a tradition of doing something good. Like most, I try to do good on a daily basis; but I wanted to do something-out-of-the-ordinary good. Why? Because I feel that since I was given the blessing to be alive for another year, I should do something that shows my appreciation for this thing called life–which many of us sooooo take for granted. Yes I’m broke, yes I’m still living with the folks, and yes things could be better…but then they could be worse.

I also realized just HOW appreciative I am of my parents. Yes they irritate me with their nagging questions about my future plans, their conservative ways of approaching issues, etc–and I’m sure I irritate them all the time.

But they got me a card with some money and a box of chocolates, my traditional birthday gift from them for the last how many years. My mom cleaned the house and bought some fresh flowers to decorate the house with, and cooked a nice Ethiopian dinner for the three of us. I honestly didn’t expect anything more than the card and chocolates, but it was very nice. These were relatively small gestures, but I didn’t take them for granted. They cared. I know I have plenty of friends whose parents don’t go out of their way the way my parents did; and so I am grateful for their efforts. They care…so I consider myself very lucky.

On another note, I have developed what some of my friends call a somewhat irrational phobia of aging (which I still believe is actually normal). Not just aging physically, but mentally, socially, professionally, emotionally….anything “-ally” really. There are many reports on this–on “us,” by which I mean the so-called “Millennial” generation. They say we were pampered, told that we were special all along, that we’re dangerously ambitious, the most technologically-able, the most studied generation, most accomplished, most pressured, unable to cope with rejection, and so forth–which is true. All of it. There’s just too much going on today. Everyone’s getting multiple degrees, multiple jobs, wired to every piece of technology, trying to save the world… I guess what I’m trying to say is that perhaps we should slow down sometimes. Society is transforming and becoming so fast-paced that we don’t enjoy the things we used to. Anyway, I’m rambling now, so, to end my point..

…enjoy life while your living it today–don’t waste time planning to enjoy it because tomorrow is never promised.

Sincerely,

Yesterday’s Birthday Girl

I get bored very easily. Thus my lack of entries in recent weeks.

Nonetheless, I found something stupid, yet increasingly funny about social media psychology. Symptoms of online social media sensitivity that include a variety of seemingly insignificant things that really shouldn’t matter. But as our lives become intertwined with digital communication–to the point that we feel more emotions online than in person–I felt that some scenarios should be addressed. See if you find yourself in any of the following situations. And PLEASE do not try to front like you haven’t experienced at least one. There is no need to feel ashamed.

Scenario #1: They respond to other people’s comments but yours.

Have you ever visited someone’s page on FB and made a comment on a status or picture that has drawn a ton of responses from other FB ‘friends?’ And as you read the conversations, you notice that this person replies to everyone, i.e.:

“@ Tim TooCoolForSchool Smith: i know you’re SOO cool for saying that!! @ Mz Dimepiece: girl u crazy LOL!”

Everyone EXCEPT YOU. How lame do you feel now? Was your comment not funny or witty enough for a reply? It’s kind of like saying “I hereby declare you and your accompanying comments UNCOOL on my page in front of the entire FB community!” Such a passive way to make someone feel lame, yet it does.

Scenario #2: You interact with each other all the time ONLINE. But when you see each other in person, it gets awkward.

You know the situation. You and someone else that you’ve seen around (or never even met) but haven’t really hung out with, ALWAYS comment on each other’s pictures, statuses, notes, etc. You’ll even have an incredible amount of things in common. But for reasons unknown, when the forces put you two in a live-person situation–perhaps an encounter in the hall or some function–it gets real awkward. You both can go on for days about some issue on FB, but when you come face-to-face with this person, it’s like you both pretend not to know each other. You’re either ashamed to speak to them in person, or you honestly don’t know how to interact with them outside of digital communication. It’s like online social media and the real world are two COMPLETELY separate worlds. Weird.

Scenario #3: You want to be mentioned by someone on Twitter.

For the record, let me begin by stating that Twitter is only useful as a real-time news feed and a marketing tool. Alas, many use it as a sort of ‘public’ texting application–to engage in some sort of public conversation (social “networking,” if you will)–that is really the latest version of FB status rambling (which in itself, could be considered ‘self-branding’). In any case, your Twitter homepage is bombarded by the conversations of your friends–retweets by your twitter-obsessed friends, hashtags, and other useless and otherwise irrelevant information. But sometimes, you want to jump into that public conversation…you just don’t know how. Perhaps, if you mention one of your friends and say something that you could have easily texted them, they’ll respond, and POOF! The WHOLE WORLD will take notice and begin to follow your every move online. Alas, it does not work this way. You end up looking dumb because they will usually ignore you. If you are not a regular Twitter user (or famous), don’t expect to just jump into the cool Twitter crowd. There’s just too much noise online.

Senario #4: You are competing with their BlackBerry/iPhone

I CANNOT stress to you how PEEVED I become when someone thinks they can get away with talking to me with the wandering-eye that shifts to their stupid phone. Do you really need to update your Twitter while I’m talking to you? Do I need to magically turn into a text message for you to pay attention to me–someone who is standing right in front of you? Don’t be rude.

It’s kind of insane when you think about the social and psychological implications of evolving technologies and social media outlets. Just step back once in a while and try to remember what it was like without these technologies.

You know, like five years ago.

The Grammys were awful. Period. I never really watch the award show because I think they suck (which is generally true). But I did watch the 2010 Grammys for two reasons only:

1. To see the MJ tribute, and to hear his kids speak, and
2. To see Lady Gaga’s performance

Here is my recap (not in order) of last night’s painful 3-hour telecast of the Country Music Awards—I mean, the Grammys:

-Lady Gaga opened the show with a brilliant performance with music’s great Sir Elton John. (Kind of got my hopes up for the show)

-Stephen Colbert begins an awful and extremely UN-funny monologue to present or introduce something or someone. See, it was so bad I don’t even remember. Note to the Grammys: use Jon Stewart next time.

-I didn’t know the Grammys started playing music to end acceptance speeches. What’s worse is that they cut off the mic, and several people (notably The Dream) got TREATED TO THE MAX. Watch when it happens at 0:53 HERE
UBER Grammy FAIL.

-Beyonce’s performance was a snore. I very much dislike the song “Halo” therefore she lost with me from the get-go.

Some boring, recycled performances in the middle:

-Pink and her Cirque du Soleil routine that she did during MTV’s VMAs last September. Only this time she added water. Mother said it looked like she was peeing everywhere.
-Black Eyed Peas, blah.
-Some country and/or rock performances.
-I don’t listen to them, but Green Day’s performance was cool.
-Thank God for the tom-foolery of a performance by Jamie Foxx, T-Pain, and Slash (and Doug E. Fresh, I guess) to wake us up.

-And why the HELL is LL Cool J still presenting anything? He is so irrelevant right now in the music industry.

MJ Tribute

I’m upset that I didn’t have the 3-D glasses to watch the tribute in, but it was still good nonetheless. All were great singers and did a great job. Bravo.

And EXTRA MAJOR BOOOO to Sony for forcing Lionel Richie to make that shameless plug for the recently released This is It DVD before the tribute. Seriously.

The kids: Nice speech from Prince—Paris, not so much, but whatever. Watch at 0:50 for the SPEECH

She broke our hearts at her father’s memorial, and she was probably nervous last night, so who cares. And for everyone who still doubts that those are MJ’s biological kids, remember that all you can do is take his word for it. Yeah, it may seem a little sketchy, but remember that black comes in every color, shape, and form. And even IF they weren’t biologically MJ’s, he raised them as his own, and that’s all that matters. Moving on.

-It seems that the production crews tried to “out-light” themselves for a lot of performances to make up for the lack of creativity. I could have sworn it was a light show and not a singing performance for most of the night.

-Yes, Lady Gaga got RIPPED OFF for not winning anything on the televised event. (She won two Grammys in the pre-telecast). But remember—MJ only won one Grammy for his Off The Wall album before winning EIGHT for his next album Thriller. Justice will prevail.

-TOMATOES for that Drake, Em, and Weezy performance that was censored about 75% of the time. Thought it was just my TV, but realized that you just don’t put those three on TV for a Grammy performance.

-Kanye was heavily snubbed by the Grammys, even though he did win one for the compilation of “Run This Town.”

Speaking of which, it’s funny that everyone wanted him back on stage when Taylor Swift won Album of the Year, etc. Despite her genre’s lack of popularity in mainstream pop, the girl isn’t even 20 years old, and wrote all her own material on her album. And to be fair, the majority of people reading this post probably didn’t list to her album, so you can’t really comment outside of your own bias. Kudos to her—she probably did deserve those awards. But let’s be real—she probably owes her new-found fame to Kanye’s outburst at the VMAs. And maybe we didn’t didn’t want her to win.

The Grammys are an extremely poor representation of an artist’s worth, and I hope they know that.

Exhibit A: last night.

So I’m pretty sure that we all heard about how Obama’s historic 1-year anniversary in the White House was pretty much spat on by the Civil Rights era-type comments from a member of his own party, as well as our attention-craving, failure of a governor that is Rod Blagojevich. In case you missed it, here is what the two said:

Senator Harry Reid, who is the Democratic majority leader, once stated during Obama’s campaign that President Obama could become the first black president because he was “light-skinned” and had “no Negro dialect, unless he wanted to have one.” Unless he ‘wanted’ to have one. Rich. Read more here

Rod Blagojevich, in an interview with Esquire Magazine for their Feb. issue: “I’m blacker than Barack Obama,” he states, because he “shined shoes as a child, grew up in a five-room apartment,” and that his father had a laundromat “in a black community not far from where we lived.” Alright homeboy. Read the rest here.

Both have since recanted their statements and apologized, though it’s only been reported that President Obama has accepted Reid’s apology. Either way, I’m pretty sure this won’t be the last time we’ll hear similar sentiments come to light.

Now, having a conversation about this with family, one particular member stated that it was OK for Senator Reid to say what he said because it was the “truth” and that he shouldn’t be in trouble for speaking the truth. In the same breath, they also stated that Blagojevich was wrong to say what he said because he used race rather than his socio-economic status to describe his upbringing; thus making the sweeping (but-not-so-far-from-the-truth) statement that to be black is to grow up poor, or ‘not as fortunate,’ to say the least.

To that family member, I replied that neither statement was justified. Yes, they were correct in stating that Blago should not have used race when it was really his socio-economic status that he was describing (though unfortunately, being “blacker” has evolved into a negative stereotype of being poor, ‘ghetto,’ unintelligent, among other things). As for Reid: But everyone knows that what he said was the truth and [Senator Reid] should have the right to say what he wants, they said. Mmmm that is correct—everyone is entitled to their opinion no doubt. But to express that opinion without thinking about the consequences is pretty much suicide. Not only do you embarrass yourself, but you risk losing your job, credibility, friends, support, etc. Republicans were in an uproar because they believed that Democrats found it easier to forgive their own for catastrophic mistakes, but would have pursued a removal from office had it been someone from the Republican Party. This is probably true. Double standard? Well that’s life and nothing new.

While the idea of freedom of speech seems wonderful, do not be fooled. Though it may not be written in the Constitution, there are a ton of asterisks following that right – FCC regulations for radio and television, censorship of music, best practices for businesses that want to avoid lawsuits for hiring and sexual harassment, and much more. I can bet anyone a million bucks that poor Senator Reid was (and probably still is) not the only one who was feeling those sentiments—it’s just that Reid happened to get caught saying it.

Happy 1st Presidential Anniversary, President Obama. Three more years of enduring friends and enemies that continue to undermine you–even though you are probably smarter than all of them.

Happy New Year. 

I am particularly anxious as we start this new decade.  I am excited at the thought of moving on with the next chapter of my life, yet concerned about how I will pursue my dreams. 

 I had a couple of friends who started their first, real post-graduate job today.  I am so excited for them and my other friends who are working in the so-called real world, getting their ‘grown-up’ on.  In the meantime, a relative of mine sat me down a couple of days ago to discuss two completely opposite ideas (in my opinion): going to graduate school, and getting married.

 Can I TELL you how awkward the latter part of this conversation is to have with some person, let alone a relative.

 “Don’t You Want to Get Married Soon?”

 Ugh, no.  I was told that I should be looking a ‘significant other’ now because it’s nice to have a “friend,”—as they so carefully described it.  They even went so far as to suggest visiting a certain locale outside of Chicago to pursue this man-hunt.  I felt bad because I want to make this relative happy; but I told them that the idea of a finding a companion wasn’t exactly on my radar at the moment.  I want to focus on finding a career.  I want to focus on ME and ME alone.  I’m not being selfish because I’m doing it for the greater good.

 I Want Five Kids So That I Can Be Like the Cosby Family, But…

 …I began to question if I’m appropriate for children recently.  Many say I’m not.  You see, I agreed to help a friend babysit some six (yes SIX) bright-eyed, sticky-fingered, Energizer Bunnies for a few hours on New Year’s Eve before going out.  I will admit to the world that this was in fact, my first time babysitting.  Ever.  In life.  I don’t know if it’s because my parents never trusted me to babysit anyone’s kid, or if they secretly were doing me a favor by protecting me from the grossness that are toddlers.   And DHFS. Because God KNOWS….never mind, I digress.

 At first I just sat on the couch while my friend chased after the kids.  I felt bad because I wasn’t really helping, but I couldn’t help but observe the behavior of these toddlers.  Their cuteness disappeared as soon as one of them coughed (mouth all open of course).  Gross.  One of the boys decided to go treasure hunting in his one of his nasal passages.  Just ALL up in it.  And then he proceeded to touch every nook and cranny of his toys.  Vomit.  And then there was Slobber Roger.  He was a quiet kid, very easy-going.  But you know how kids are supposed to develop their motor skills, like catching a ball?  I don’t think this particular child developed the skills for his mouth.  It just stayed open.  Ok let me stop—you get how my experience was.

 My point is I can’t stress myself about all these things.  If they happen, they will happen.  I need to focus on one thing at time.  On the ‘now’—this for me is finding a career. 

What’s on your radar for the new decade?